Discworld – Maskerade (Terry Pratchett)

The curtains closed. The audience was still on its feet, applauding.

'What happens now?' whispered Agnes to the next gypsy.

He pulled off his bandanna. 'Well, dear, we generally nip out to- Oh, no, they're going for a curtain call!'

The curtains opened again. The light caught Christine, who curtsied and waved and sparkled.

Her fellow-gypsy nudged Agnes. 'Look at Dame Timpani,' he said. 'There's a nose in a sling if ever I saw one.'

Agnes stared at the prima donna.

'She's smiling,' she said.

'So does a tiger, dear.'

The curtains shut once more, with a finality that said the stage manager was going to strike the set and would scream at someone if they dared to touch those ropes again … .

Agnes ran off with the others. There wasn't too much to do in the next act. She'd tried to memorize the plot earlier-although other members of the chorus had done their best to dissuade her, on the basis that you could either sing them or understand them, but not both.

Nevertheless, Agnes was conscientious.

'… so Peccadillo (ten.), the son of Duke Tagliatella (bass), has secretly disguised himself as a swineherd to woo Quizella, not knowing that Doctor Bufola (bar.) has sold the elixir to Ludi the servant, without realizing he is really the maid Iodine (sop.) dressed up as a boy because Count Artaud (bar.) claims that…'

A deputy stage manager pulled her out of the way and waved at someone in the wings.

'Lose the countryside, Ron.'

There was a series of whistles from offstage, answered by another from above.

The backcloth rose. From the gloom above, the sandbag counterweights began to descend.

'… then Artaud reveals, er, that Zibeline must marry Fideli, I mean Fiabe, not knowing, er, that the family fortunes…'

The sandbags came down. On one side of the stage, at least. On the other side, Agnes was interrupted in her impossible task by the screaming, and looked around into the upside-down and not at all well features of the late Dr Undershaft.